Raven's Secret Diary
by Issylt
Summary: Everyone knows Raven to be cold, emotionless and grim. However, if you were to stumble across her secret diary, you would find out at once that she values friendship as highly as anyone else...and maybe might even have a secret love.
1. Beast Boy

**Ok, I obviously don't own any of the characters here. **

Dear diary,

What a day it has been now. Had to fight off ten or so robbers robbing some mysterious chip from a secret location. Still haven't found out who's behind the robbery. Robin says he'll devote the rest of his day finding out the mastermind behind all this.

Beast Boy, being Beast Boy, has been his usual self. Has been cracking silly jokes until I thought I would run mad on the spot. Only stopped when I threatened to send him to another dimension.

Beast Boy. That green fellow is the only Titan who has _that_ much capacity to laugh and joke and make fun of everything and anything. More than anyone else, he seriously makes me so annoyed that there are times when I feel like just sending him to some other dimension without warning him.

But I will never do that.

For, irritating as Beast Boy can be, he's still my friend. My good friend. And no matter how much we may bicker and fight and argue, I will always hold him as the only friend who can ever make me smile.

**Review, please, guys, and tell me what you think! I know it's a bit short, but I don't, at this point, have enough time to lengthen it yet. It's my first ever TT fic, so please be gentle. Thanks! **


	2. Terra

Dear diary,

It was a pleasant surprise for all of us Titans today to receive a new member into our team: Terra.

We had known her before, while her unusual terrakinetic powers were still completely out of control. Attacked by a giant scorpion, we had raced to her rescue, only for her to turn around at the last moment to use her powers to bring a huge rock down on her enemy.

That was the start of a whole new adventure together for the six of us. Terra left us for a while, after fearing that we would discriminate her for her lack of control over her powers. To cut it short, she ran away – and returned to us yesterday – with remarkable control over her powers now.

To tell you the truth, I didn't at all trust her when she asked again to rejoin us as a Titan. Her sudden control over her powers and eagerness to join us made me rather uneasy; I warned Robin, but he insisted on giving her a chance first.

And, although I _did _warn Robin that I saw a sudden dark image of her linked with the enemy, he still insisted on giving her a chance.

Thank goodness I listened to him.

To cut a long story short, well, our Titans Tower fell under attack from Slade after a series of attacks from odd machines on the city drew us out of our home. Terra saved our home. Simple as that. Perhaps I had been wrong about her all the while. Maybe it was time to really give her the chance she deserved all along. And so, Robin gave her a Titans communicator, and she officially became one of us.

I don't tell people what I really think of that yellow-haired, blue-eyed girl. I treat her more or less the same as I would treat anyone around me; with a certain sort of indifference. I know people think me proud and selfish and uncaring. Not true. The Raven they think they know on the outside is not quite the same Raven on the inside. For reasons I will not reveal here, it's simply safer and better for me to remain emotionless, as I always have been all these years.

The strange truth is, I really do quite admire Terra. She may not have Robin's leadership qualities, or Starfire's undying loyalty to her friends, but she really is a person to be admired. Her courage, strength, openness and determination are remarkable, no doubt about that. That's what I like so much about her. Not because she draws Beast Boy's attention so much that he no longer has enough time to disturb the rest of us with his so-called funny jokes. OK, maybe that _is _a factor, but it would certainly be a big, fat lie to say it is THE main reason.

Still, there are times when I still feel just a trifle uneasy around her. Her past remains a secret; till today, she has yet to reveal where and how she learned to master her powers fully. We have asked her that question several times now, but she has always refused to give us an answer. Why, I do not know. All she ever says is that she learned from a good and powerful master who taught her extremely effective tricks to keep her powers at bay. What, however, I do not tell the others is the fact that I still see odd, dark vision of her from time to time. Images of her involved with a certain enemy whom Robin has a particular hatred for. Better not to mention names her yet; after all Terra has done for us, it would hardly seem fair to accuse her of being involved with _him_. For now, I can only watch her carefully, and hope profusely that these vision I see, born of my odd telepathic abilities, are merely a figment of imagination due to an over-suspicious mind, not real ones.


	3. Starfire

Dear diary,

I'm still finding it extremely difficult to believe that me and Starfire have actually experienced each other's powers today. All thanks to that Puppet King.

That little wooden villain somehow managed to transfer the lives of Robin, Cyborg and Beast Boy into three puppets of his, so that their real bodies were soon taken over by the Puppet King. He would have done the same to me and Starfire, but I, in a final desperate attempt to protect at least me and Star, used a quick, strong bout of telekinetic energy to knock the control out of the Puppet King's hand. We fled, of course, the moment we were freed, into a dark basement underground.

What I, however, was not prepared for, was to switch on a light and see standing directly opposite me, my very own body. Star undoubtedly felt exactly the same way, for she actually screamed aloud to see herself standing opposite her. Somehow, in the process of knocking the control away, we had ended up switching bodies, though our minds and emotions stayed the same – only in different host bodies.

Somehow or other, we managed to put aside our _very _major differences for a while, after a whole series of bickering and arguing about how on earth we were supposed to use each other's powers, very new and foreign to us both. Star had no idea whatsoever how to meditate or keep her emotions in check, the only way to keep my powerful telekinetic abilities under full control. I, on the other hand, had _extreme _difficulty in conjuring up enough happy thoughts to unleash Star's flying abilities, starbolts and eye lasers.

And so, we ended up arguing and fighting for ages about how we were supposed to rescue our captive friends when we couldn't even harness each other's powers. Star, for almost the first time, lost her temper, and accused me of being "rude and grumpy and unhelpful". I, in turn, retorted that she knew nothing about me. This pricked her heavily, it seemed, for she suddenly deflated like a punctured balloon, and confessed it was true. It seemed a waste of precious time, but I decided to consent to her idea of sharing a little about each other, so that it would make it easier to unleash each other's powers, if we could at least understand each other. She told me all about her Tamarenian life in Tamaran, while I, in turn, shared guardedly a brief account of my past in Azarath, careful not to reveal too much about it. There are some things I just can't tell people.

To cut a very long story short, we succeeded. After what seemed like hours of ferocious fighting, we finally managed to overcome our enemy, I using Star's flying abilities and starbolts, and Star, whatever she could of my telekinesis. After destroying the Puppet King, at long last, our rightful bodies were returned to each of us.

Oddly, me and Star spent the rest of the day meditating together in the front of the Titans' Tower.

The bond between us, however, became far stronger than what it was in the past, make no doubt of that. After spending half a day together, just the two of us, in each other's bodies, I suppose it's only natural to form a much deeper bond than usual. Star's a most unusual person, being an almost alien girl from another planet, and she _always _tries to bring in some of her peculiar customs (especially food and jokes), which at times can be _most _annoying. But she means well, I know. She's just one of those people who have some difficulty in settling into a new life at first. And, of course, despite her slightly peculiar customs, she's the most loyal of the Titans, who will never turn her back on any of her friends, no matter what happens. Such loyalty, I admit, is extremely rare; I have yet to find someone who comes close to that.

We still 'hang out' together at times now, whenever time permits us to do so. We don't usually talk much; we might just take a simple walk out on the block, or train or even meditate together. It's kinda fun at times, since it _does _offer me some relief and time off from thinking about my dark past and…destiny.

Who knows? Someday, if my past permits it, we may even become _best_ friends.


	4. Cyborg

Dear diary,

For the first time in my life, I nearly blew my top with Cyborg, that half-human, half-machine member of our team. For a full fifteen minutes, while I was trying to read in peace, he actually kept bugging me to play some cyber game with him!

Cyber games are such a bore; there's nothing so exciting about them. All you do, after all, is press buttons endlessly. How dull can that get? I got so annoyed that I could actually almost feel the dark side rising up in me for a moment. Thank goodness all the training I've ever received from the monks of Azarath helped me _immensely _at that moment.

Cyborg, Cyborg…sometimes, that (boy?) acts like an exact replicate of Beast Boy: addicted to cyber games, loves playing pranks, and cracks too many jokes. Huh! Between them, the two of them are surely capable enough by now to bring down the roof upon us all with their craziness.

But still, I must admit Cyborg is pretty much the kind of friend anyone would want to have. Caring, sensitive, loyal, warm, you name it! More like another version of Starfire (without all those weird customs and terms, of course). I'm not quite in love with him, but the truth is, if I ever face more…superficial problems, Cyborg is the person to turn to any day. Not Beast Boy or Terra or even Star. Hard to explain, but there's just a little something-something innocent and open about Cyborg that makes confiding in him extremely easy.

But matters are _so_ much more complicated when it comes to the one and only person I truly love.

**Review please, guys!!! Then you'll see the fluff much sooner…**


	5. Robin

Dear diary,

Me and Robin were unfortunate enough to get caught together by Beast Boy today, who, of course, being Beast Boy, teased us about being on "a date". Huh! As if we would do that so openly! All we were doing was discussing what to do with a certain villain we had caught, and then that annoying green boy had to come along and poke fun at us!

It's just not like that with me and Robin. I won't say we're just _friends_; what goes on between us is much deeper than that, just as Beast Boy and Terra are so obviously more than just best buddies.

We certainly don't hug or kiss or hold hands, or do all that lovey-dovey stuff you might see in the romantic Hollywood films. It's not something I would do even if Robin wanted it, and it's most definitely not something Robin would do even I wanted it. We don't believe in doing that kind of thing. It just _isn't _our sort of thing.

It would be fair enough to say that our relationship is far more complex than what people can see. It goes beyond mere friendship, and yet, it's not the kind of deep, passionate romantic love you see in love films. It's something…deeper, more profound, purer. You won't see us on a date during Valentine's Day, or giving each other presents.

Of course, there are times when we do give in just slightly to our emotions. During battles against the bad guys, we have a tendency to be very quick in rushing to each other's aid if necessary. Sometimes, he gives me a quick pat on the shoulder after such times. Sometimes, I might give his hand a brief touch to thank him. That's about as far as it gets. The farthest, however, we've got with each other is a simple hug of gratitude. And that, only twice. The first time was after our final battle with Trigon. To show Robin my gratitude, I allowed myself to give him a warm embrace when it was all over. The second time came after another ferocious battle with another mighty villain. Taken off-guard, I was somewhat knocked out, but Robin, that hero-boy, came after the villain, and stopped him from giving me a fatal blow. Relieved to still be alive, I actually jumped up and gave him a slightly too-big hug after Starfire dealt the villain the final blow. Maybe it was bad timing, seeing how the others were looking at us, especially Beast Boy, but I never regretted it.

I suppose all this has come from our trials and troubles together. When Robin was still deeply troubled after his experiences with that Slade, I was forced to telepathically enter his mind to find out the source of his worries and odd, frightening behaviour. Having been into his mind for the first time, something of him partially went into me; it can't be taken back now. And, during that unforgettable events with my evil, inter-dimensional monster of a father, Trigon, or Scath, our bond became even closer. As the end drew near, Robin was always there for me, to give me his support and friendship and protection. He knew something of my past, but he didn't break up our relationship. Because of his staunch support and loyalty, I, no,_we _all made it through together, and defeated Trigon once and for all! I didn't mention this to the others, but I knew only too well that without Robin's patience and loyalty and determination, we would probably have never pulled through, for I would undoubtedly never have found within myself the courage and strength to unleash that deepest power within myself.

Our relationship became markedly…different after that event. We've been spending much more time together regularly now, usually just discussing the matter about Slade (which has yet to be resolved), training or just having casual (no romantic!) talk. Or, sometimes, we might just spend a little quiet time together on the roof of the Titans' Tower, watching the sun set and rise, surrounded by its lovely golden majesty. Don't get me wrong; you'll assuredly _never_ find us kissing or holding hands or even touching. All we do is sit there quietly, side-by-side, but never quite touching.

It's the only time we are ever free to be ourselves, without having to deal with villains and troubles and more fighting.

**THE END now, guys!!! Hoped you like it! Please REVIEW now and tell me what you think! Doesn't matter if you don't have a FF account, you're still free to review!!! **

**And a big fat thanks to****DarkGirlRavenGrayson14**** for reviewing every single chappie!! You rock!!! I'm glad you lurve RobRae pairings too! **


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